Renee's Birthday is today. The photo above was taken during her pregnancy. I think Renee had bravely made pasta for her Italian in-laws. Luckily, she was never put off by my sister's poor dining etiquette. And, yes, Anthony and Christopher are indeed as ornery as they look.

On the Anniversary

Today, I remember what Renee was to me.

When you get married, you hear a lot of flowery language about two people becoming one. Being poetically tone-deaf, such words were always lost on me. As I look back at my time with Renee, I see how she became a part of me and I her. When faced with the hard decisions of everyday life, such as, where we do live, where do I work, how do I teach and care for Henry, I hear her gentle voice advising me. Not literally, of course, but I feel her in my mind.

I can almost see her. She would furrow her brow, thinking hard about what would be best for Henry and I. She would never put herself first, she just wasn't wired that way. Finally, she would turn to me and, in a way that said she wasn't exactly sure, she would tell me what she thinks is best. And it always was.

She is still in me. I feel her this morning. I hope she knows how much I still I love her.

The Augustine Visit

Back in 2004, our friends Jade and Augie visited us. We hiked up Chief Mountain, the same mountain where we got engaged. She really enjoyed their visit. It was the first time she really got to know Jade and she loved her immediately. After they left, she wouldn't shut up about how much she wished they'd move out.

Jade, Augie and Renee taking a break on the way up the mountain. Stopping for the photo was most likely my idea and probably just an excuse to catch my breath. Renee never minded my poor cardio.

Amy & Renee

 

Hi Chad,

I hope all is well with you and Henry. It's so hard to believe that he will soon be 3 years old.

As usual, Renee is always in my thoughts... especially each year on her birthday. Last week on the 13th, I sent a picture of Renee and I to my Uncle Leonard and Aunt Sylvia, letting them know that I was thinking of Renee on what would have been her 37th birthday. My Uncle Leonard suggested that I forward that picture on to you and Henry. I have so many more photos of Renee and someday I hope to (summon up the courage to) go through all of them. When I do, I will certainly forward some on to you so that you can share them with Henry.

Have a Happy Thanksgiving!

Love,
Amy

Hikes

Renee and I used to do a lot of hikes when we first moved out to Denver. Nothing impressive, just one moderate trail on the weekend. She would always pack a lunch and bring too much water that I would have to haul in our daypack. We always came back with at least one untouched bottle.

She loved to check out the mountain flowers and spent a lot of time examining each new discovery. I only wanted to take photos at the top and didn't appreciate the hike itself, at least not like Renee did.

Today, I am taking Henry for a hike. I'm bringing plenty of water and I'm not going to rush to the top.

Sixth Grade

I've always said that I first became friends with Renee in third grade and she always agreed. This photo, however, is from sixth grade, I think. (The few photos I have of us from years before aren't very good quality, so they'll stay in my photo albums fo now.) In this picture, we are sitting in the back on the far left - Renee has really long brown hair and I'm the dork next to her. I'm sure the two of us could name everyone in the picture today.

Although I don't have an exact memory from when this photo was taken, I do have some memories from early on in our friendship to share. I remember playing Barbies at Renee's house - I believe she had the camper and I longed for that! With her being the youngest of six and me being the second oldest of who knows how many at that time, it was always so much fun to play with all her toys. I remember us being able to make macaroni and cheese by ourselves, which was a very big deal to me. I remember Renee liking to have friends spend the night, but not being especially comfortable spending the night at friends' - I could relate. I remember us getting money from her mom to walk down to Taco Bell for an enchirito or burrito supreme or for something from Dairy Queen - that tradition lasted through college, I think. What I remember most about Renee from those early years is her being pretty quiet, but she was always fun to be around. It's like I was immediately comfortable around her. We just clicked. That doesn't always happen. We clicked for 25 years to be exact.

- Kristi

Mexican Vanilla

When Chad and Renee returned from their honeymoon in Mexico, Renee brought me back a bottle of vanilla. I have used the special extract sparingly over the last few years only to use the very last drop a few months ago. I thought of all the fun times I had with Renee – wedding preparations, hiking, happy hours and hilarious, dry humor stories and carefully placed the empty bottle back on the shelf. My husband Kip took a trip to Mexico this January with work. After gifting our two boys with t-shirts and rocks, he handed me a new bottle of vanilla and said it could never replace the one that Renee had given to me, but at least it would bring back good memories of her amazing spirit.

Love,

Laura

August 2004

Your mom was a beautiful person and I think of her often. We came to visit your mom and dad in August of 2004, they had a doctor’s appointment while we were there and got to hear your heartbeat, it was very special for both of them. I would never trade this time with your mom because we got to talk a lot about her expectations for you and for herself as a parent. We spent time talking about our hopes and dreams for our children.

One of the things that causes me such sadness when I think about your mom is, I know how desperately she wanted to be a good mom to you and how she wanted to make the right choices for you. Your dad is doing an amazing job at being a parent and I know that he makes decisions with your mom in mind, and probably often thinks about what she would have wanted for you. There were so many special things about your mom and over time, I am sure people will share with you what an extraordinary person she was. She will never be forgotten.

- Cindy Chilcote

Intructions

Memories. To share your memory of Renee, simply click on one of the two links under the "SEND A MEMORY" section found on the left side of this page. Some of us may not wish to post our personal memories in such a public way. So, I have provided two options, one public and one private.

If you choose the public option, I will post it on this site for everyone to enjoy. If you choose the private option, I will save it for Henry to read when he is older.

If you have any digital photos, you can attach them to your email.

Comments. Feel free to comment on any of the memories posted here. Just click on the "comments" link found at the bottom of each post.

Renee was a rare person. She was complex and simple, open and shy, serious and silly. I hope this collection of memories will give Henry a glimpse of just how beautiful she was.